Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Sorry I have been gone so long.

I have been less than disciplined in my posts but there is a good reason. As you all know we had a run of bad luck around my house that lasted almost a year. It culminated with hurrican Gustav putting a tree in my house and my wife totaling our vehicle that we had paid off two months prior. Oh and the minor knee surgery my wife had turned out to be not so minor. According to the doctor she will never run again. For someone that had just discovered the joy of marathon running this was kind of a blow. That is the reason that I was lax in my posting. I had to travel back and forth home every day to take care of her for a month and a half so I didn't workout either.

Throughout this all I kept my optimism but it was tough.

Since my last post I have been doing some training and other stuff.

I ran a half marathon in Maui. This was brutal. I didn't get to train at all for this. Imagine someone coming up to you and handing you running shoes and some shorts and telling you to run a half marathon. That is about what it was like. Against my wifes advice I didn't eat anything before running it either. I was a mess. I ended up walking about 1/3 to 1/2 of it. I just ran out of gas. On the last 2 miles I started cramping which was fun. I did finish though, in all of my fat shirtless glory I finished.

I also rode 150 miles one weekend to raise money for Multiple Sclerosis. I did this with no prior training other than a 15 mile bike ride to get my bike adjusted. Believe it or not it was fun. The doctors are pretty optimistic about being able to get the bike seat out of the crack of my butt too.

I am going to start posting pictures in the next week or so.

Diet-

I have modified my diet yet again. I am eating considerably less than I was before. I think this will help drop the weight and I am going to let my body tell me when I need more calories.
I know what running and not having the energy feels like so I can use that as a gauge.
This is what I eat during the week. On weekends I slip a little bit but I think that is acceptable.

Breakfast.
1 bagel with 2 tablespoons of lowfat cream cheese- about 400 calories

Lunch
1 protien shake about 400 calories

Dinner
1 package of rice, vegitables and chicken otherwise known as a steamable pre-packaged frozen dinner. They are tasty have very few perservatives and only have about 400 calories.
1 bagel just like I eat at breakfast- about 400 calories

In total I eat about 1600 calories a day. I seem to stay pretty satisfied as long as I don't change my diet up too much. On top of this I have the energy to exercise.

I have been exercising as well.

My schedule will look something like this.
Saturday- Bike and run - currently 25 miles and two miles respectively
Sunday - off
Monday - Run - 5 miles
Tuesday - Run - 4 miles
Wednesday - Swim
Thursday - off
Friday - whatever I feel like I need

All workouts are at least 45 minutes to 2 hours. I know this seems like a lot for a guy that weighs 250. I am in pretty good shape I am just fat and that is all there is too it.

With my diet and the exercise I am running a calorie deficit of about 1400 calories a day. This should give me the weight loss I am looking for. If I start to lose any muscle I am going to add more calories via protien.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

178

I know that you might think having a random number as a post title is silly but let me explain.

When I started this blog I set out to have a six pack in short order. If you have read the posts below life got in the way and I am a little unhappy about that but that's how it goes.

If you also read back a page or two I mentioned that I might like to try my hand at a triathlon. In reality I was dead set on doing a triathlon and dropping weight (getting a six pack) was part of my master plan. I figured that moving my body 70 miles would be easier if I didn't weigh as much as a small Hippo.

Here I am with 9 months to go before a my triathlon and I have to be able to swim 1.2 miles, bike 56 miles and then run a half marathon. For me this is no small feat. I am not really built like an endurance athelete if you haven't noticed.

That is why I have switched gears a little bit and modified my workout. As it stands for the past two weeks I have started running an biking in "training" for my triathlon. I will still have the goal of getting a six pack the method has just changed. I will be doing more "typical" exercises that people do to lose weight. I will still try to do the push ups and sit ups but I will do them according to how I feel.

Since I got a place in New Orleans to stay during the week I have changed my diet. I don't have my wonderful wife to cook for me so my diet is rather spartan in nature. It goes like this.

Morning- protien shake- I exercise in the morning and cooking breakfast isn't an option due to time constraints
9Am I eat an apple
Lunch- I eat chicken breast and steamed vegtables. Usually about 2 cups, Sometimes I add spaghetti with plain sauce.
3pm I eat another apple
For dinner I usually eat I eat chicken breast and steamed vegtables. Usually about 2 cups Sometimes I add spaghetti with plain sauce.
If I get hungry for something sweet I will have a peanut butter an jelly sandwich. with a glass of milk.
I really have to watch what I eat and make sure I eat enough. If I don't I just don't have the energy to exercise.

As of now this is my training schedule
Monday- Afternoon run- usually about 3 or more miles
Tuesday- Morning run - 3.2 miles Afternoon Bike - Brisk pace for 1 hour or more
Wednesday - This is going to be my swim day but I haven't found a pool yet
Thursday - Morning run 3.2 miles
Friday off
Saturday - long run- Last week was 4.5 miles and I am going to try to add a mile each Saturday.
Sunday I might take this day off depending on how I feel.

As for the 178, that is my pulse rate when I am running a 10 minute mile. At least that's what it was this morning.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Game on people!

For everyone that reads this you are probably thinking that I am a slacker and didn't hold to my goal of getting a six pack. For those that doubt I should recap the last few months that my wife and I have had and maybe you will understand the break.

In February I changed jobs and I had to commute 220 miles each day. In early April I was bitten on the left forearm by a dog. It got infected. In late April my father passed away after a lengthy illness. During this time my wife made a few trips to Missouri to visit her father who also had cancer. In June I started to suffer from an irregular heartbeat. ( it lasted for a week) It was probably due to stress and the fact that during the week I usually slept about four hours a night. I was diagnosed with severe sleep apnea (this means the sleep that I do get sucks)
At the beginning of this month my wife's father passed away. A few days ago my wife found out she has to have surgery on her knee.

Other than that it is all good.

On a brighter note, I have found a great place in New Orleans and I spend a few nights a week there. This has allowed me to exercise on a regular basis. I am finally getting back in the swing of things and I am tuning out my schedule and diet.

I will update again in a few days.

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

A quick update

I know that I haven't been posting on here for a month and a half and there is a few good reasons.

Reason Number One

I got attacked by a dog. No this is not a joke, I was really bit in the left forearm by a dog. The bad thing is that it was my dog. I was breaking up a dog fight and I got bit accidentally but it did tear my arm up a little bit and I had to see a doctor.

If that is not bad enough it got infected. Keep in mind these were pretty deep punctures.

On the second day of the injury I noticed something started to smell bad. It was my arm. It reminded me of the line in "O Brother where art thou" when the said that the dead horse was starting to "turn". It smelled so bad my wife made me roll the window down on the way to the doctor.

A tetanus shot and a load of antibiotics later and I am almost good as new. I will probably be able to work out in a week or two.

As a side note, I am glad that I had not reached my weight loss goals. The fat in my arm protected my muscle a lot. My wife made the comment "I didn't know you had that much fat in your forearm". You could tell how much fat I had because it was visible.

I finally broke up the dog fight with a pistol.( redneck remember?) No the dogs aren't dead. One of them almost got it but the loud noise broke them up.

Just to further emphasize how much of a redneck area I live in, when I started shooting in my front yard to break up the dogs, my neighbor came down the road on his four wheeler and apoligized for taking so long. The reason that he took so long was that he had to stop what he was doing and run inside to grab his pistol. He figured if something needed killing he was going to help.

You have to love country neighbors.

Reason Number Two

My father finally lost his battle with Cancer. My Dad had been battling lung cancer for the past 15 months. He finally succumbed to his illness last Monday. He put up a valiant fight that anyone could be proud of.

Working out and spending a lot of time with my father was not manageable. I chose to spend time with my dad.

It was worth it.

I have maintained my weight and haven't gained any so that is a plus. I am looking forward to continuing my work out program and reaching my goal.

Friday, March 14, 2008

I have been a little undisciplined

It's true that I haven't posted like I should and it's all my fault.

The thing is that my new job is great but it is 110 miles from my house and yes I commute. That means that I wake up at 3:15am and leave my house at 4:05am. I get to work at 6am and work till 4PM if I am lucky I get home at 6:30 PM.

This doesn't leave a lot of time for anything really. I usually sleep about 5 hours a night because I stay up visiting with my wife.

Because of the situation above I temporarily altered my program a little bit. When I altered my program I learned a few things.

1. Doing the exercise without following a strict diet will make me glad I exercised but I will not lose any weight.

2. Following a strict diet with out doing the exercise leaves me more time for sleep but I do not lose any weight.

3. Doing the exercise while following a strict diet makes the weight fall off me.

I just can't get around it. I have to do the total program or I see no results at all.

I did also learn that I can maintain my weight. I kind of laid of of a strict diet and exercise for a week and nothing really changed, so that's good.

Last Saturday my wife and I ran a 5k race and it felt good. While I was running it dawned on me that I like running. When I was in the Army we had to run, a lot. I really got burned out on it and swore when I got out that I wasn't going to run unless I was being chased by something I couldn't kill. I really like the endurance thing and believe that we owe it to ourselves to be in good condition.

Because of the revelation above I have been considering training for a triathlon. I don't know if I am going to be able to do it because of the time commitment necessary. Most triathletes just skip out on sleep to get their training in but for me it is not an option. If I get any less sleep it will be a safety hazard because of the hours I drive.

So if I can possibly figure out how to do this I am going to shoot for the New Orleans half Iron man in 2009. That is a 1.2 mile swim followed by a 56 mile bike ride followed by a half marathon.
As amazing as it sounds to me it looks doable.

Meals.

I have eaten the same diet every day except for the week ends. Also because of my hours I eat almost around the clock. I think this is helping my weight loss. My first meal is at 3:45 am and my last meal is a 9:30pm and I eat every 3 to 4 hours in between.

Weekdays
Oatmeal/Egg Whites
several servings of fruit
steamed vegetables
Brown rice
1 large chicken breast eaten in two separate meals
1 or 2 bowls of healthy beef soup

Exercise is the sixth week of the 16 week abs workout
I also do tabata sprints when I get home before dark.

Monday, March 3, 2008

59 Days So Far


I think that I am pretty much on track.


My total weight loss in 2 months is 16 pounds. That is roughly 2 pounds a week. That is acceptable weight loss and it is healty as well.


I am a bit off of my goal of 2.5 pounds a week but I know why that is. I ran the Mardi Gras half marathon and that really cut into my training. I wasn't able to do the Tabata workout for about 3 weeks. I think this had a significant impact on my weight loss. I am starting my regular routine out today and hopefully the weight will start dropping off fast.


One good thing about my new job is that I am able to "lock" my diet in. What I mean is that I am on a regular schedule now so I can plan my meals in advance. I can eat at a set time each day and this will help me greatly.


I haven't posted a whole lot about my diet because I haven't been as strict. Monday through Friday I am pretty good but I have a tendancy to fall off on the weekends.


As far as the Half Marathon goes, it was a great experience. I hurt for about 2 days and then the pain went away (mostly). The reason that I hurt was inexperience. I made mistakes on that one that I will not make again i.e. clothing, shoes and so on.


Watching my wife train for and run her marathon taught me that it is real important for adults to have a physical goal to work for. In school we are physically fit because we compete. When we are adults we get out of shape becuse there isn't anything to win any more. It's one thing to work out but if you are training for something you tend to push yourself harder. With this in mind I am pondering a new goal. I haven't decided if I am going to do it or not but when I do I will update you.


Total weight loss so far:

16 pounds.

I weigh 246 pounds even.

I have lost .27 pounds a day. This is not taking into account any muscle weight I might have gained.


Meals

My diet has been all over the place, I will update in 3 days what my meals have been.


Exercise.

None this week I was recovering from the run.

Monday, February 25, 2008

OOOOUUUUUCCCCHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

Yes, I ran 13.1 miles yesterday. I did have a really good time and no I didn't win.

Yes, I ran the entire way.

This was the farthest that I had run, ever, and it really wasn't all that bad while I was running it.

Each day that goes by makes me marvel more and more at how perfectly designed we are. Did you know that if you are in a bad situation and need to travel long distances that your body will keep you out of pain until you get where you are going? I didn't either.

I found out yesterday.

I ran the entire 13.1 miles relatively painless. When I got done and took a shower I found out that I had rubbed a good portion of the skin off between my legs. I even had on bike shorts. They didn't help like they should have. I know that I am an inexperienced runner and that I should have applied body glide or whatever it is. I didn't and I am paying for it. They say experience is the best teacher and they are right.

I won't be able to think about any thing other than my run at least until the wounds scab over.(no I am not joking)

I did find out something else. The Tabata protocol is what was making me lose weight. I laid off of it for 3 weeks so I would be able to run the half marathon. In those three weeks my weight has remained exactly the same. I haven't lost a pound. I haven't gained any either so I guess that my diet is just about right.

I am going to lay off any exercise for the next week so I can recover from the run. I am actually chomping at the bit to get started again because I know what I have in store for me physically and I am getting impatient.

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

While you were sleeping

I was working out.

I have started my new job and it's great. Unfortunately it is 110 miles away from my house. With traffic possible in two major cities during the commute. That means I have to leave real early to get to work at a reasonable hour.

Last night I got in after a 3 hour commute home and didn't feel like doing anything at all. I pretty much ate and went to bed at 8:30pm. I happened to wake up at 1:30 this morning and couldn't go back to sleep. I laid there till 2:45 and decided to use my time wisely and get in my workout that I had missed yesterday.

I am still nursing a foot injury so I left out any leg type exercises. I have to run a half marathon on Sunday and I want to be able to do it. Because of the injury I just did upper body exercises that were a mixture of the ones in the previous workouts.

I think having a regular schedule is going to help my progress greatly. It was real easy to eat a better diet yesterday.

By the way, I am getting stronger by the day.

Meals yesterday
3 egg whites / Oatmeal
2 oranges
1 apple
3 cups of steamed vegtables
1/2 a cup of brown rice
1 baked chicken breast
2 bowls of healthy beef soup.

Exercises were a mix of upper body stuff from the 16 week abs workout.

Friday, February 15, 2008

43 days into this

I am 43 days into this and I have been negligent this last week.
I have left out the leg work outs and any cardio type work out. I have even delayed the 16 week abs work out by one week. I did this because I hurt my Plantar Fascia in my right foot running 10 miles last Saturday. It was a great run but I don't know if I have ever run that far and I paid for it. I laid off the cardio because I have a half marathon to run on the 24th and I can't run it hurt. If I get hurt running it so be it but until then I have to heal.
I did do the upper body resistance workouts. I just mixed up some of the upper body exercises from the previous weeks and did those.
I am struggling with my diet. I have been off for of work for the past 15 days and it makes it harder to keep a good diet. I am going on a regular schedule in a few days and diet will be one of my focus areas. I think once my diet gets lined out the gains will come faster.
I am updating my pictures again today. I am giving a different shot each week just to mix things up. When I get to my final goal I will post all of the pics on here.
As a side note, one of the objectives that I had for this blog I have fulfilled. A ew of my friends that have started this work out. They all thought what I did. "This doesn't look to bad". I have to tell you the 16 week work out is killer. When you get done with the first workout you are shaking like a puppy trying to pass a peach seed.
Although I have not done any cardio and have not held strictly to my diet I didn't gain a pound.
I weighed this morning and I weighed 249.6. This is the same thing that I weighed 2 weeks ago.
Here are my before and after pics. ( just to note all of the before pictures are of my first day)

Before/After

Sorry the lighting is different, we are still trying to figure that out.





Sunday, February 10, 2008

We were meant to live for so much more

The above quote is a line in a song that I love to listen to when I run. Lately my wife and I have been discussing this very thing too.

I am surrounded by people that have the potential for greatness. I don't mean local, wow that is cool greatness, I mean world class greatness. I don't know if their potential will ever be fulfilled and it pains me greatly.

It's hard to get out of your comfort zone. I know life gets busy and bills have to get paid and so on and so forth. Even though all of this is true these people should still work towards their greatness everyday. I believe that each of us has a God given talent and we are negligent if we fail to put it to good use. Think about it, you have a responsibility to the Almighty to make the most of the talents that you were given. That is an awesome responsibility.

One of the things that I always said to myself was, if I ever found out that my time was limited that I would work out and get a six pack. (I know this is a minor and superficial thing but it illustrates my point.) When I would look in the mirror at myself and see a fat guy I would always believe that there would be time to "do it later". That isn't the case.

Our days are numbered. The only day that you have is today and you might not make it through this one.

If you know what your talent is then do something today to achieve greatness. Today is the only day that you have and no, I am not going to tell you who you are.

YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!

On a lighter note, My wife and I were at Cabelas sporting goods store the other night. She said something to me that solidifies her status as a redneck for all time. She said lets buy a taser and tase each other. The first one to pee on themselves loses.

Meals.
For the last few days my meals have been a repeat of the ones before except for yesterday. Yesterday I had a "Cheeseburger in Paradise" from a local eatery. Then I had some chips and cheese. I did this because I needed a cheat day and I figured that I could spare the calories.

Exercise.

Friday I did the fifth week of the 16 week abs workout. I have laid off Tabata this week because I have a half marathon to run on the 24th and I wanted to be able to train for it.

Saturday. I ran 10 miles today and it felt really good. It felt good until I stopped. When I stopped I learned what a Plantar Fascia was. If you are wondering what it is I will tell you. It is a piece of your foot that you injure when you try to run too far. I can tell you with complete honesty that it hurts a lot.

I hope this doesn't hurt my training.

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

It's been a rough week

I seem to have hit a road bump starting on week five. The motivation left me for a few days. I didn't stop working out and I still did what I was supposed to do but my heart wasn't in it. Normally when I get ready to workout I feel strong and ready to go. I didn't get that feeling Monday. Monday I wanted to get a cheeseburger and call it a day.

I think it had something to do with the pictures that I took. In the pictures I really didn't look all that different. In person there has been a big change. Everyone comments that I look like I have lost weight.

While doing my Tabata sprints today I just ran out of gas. I am going to evaluate what is going on with my body and modify what I am doing. I don't know if I am not getting enough liquid or enough calories. Whatever it is I am going to find out and address it.

If you came here to read about how easy all this was going to be I'm sorry. I am a real fat ass trying to get real abs and it is hard sometimes. One thing that I can promise is that I will have a six pack. I don't care how long it takes or how much I have to work at it.

I will be successful.

Meals today
3 egg whites/oatmeal
3 bowls of healthy beef soup
2 cups of salad

Exercise today
Fifth week of the 16 week abs work out ( I swear I am getting stronger each time I work out)
tabata sprints

Monday, February 4, 2008

My body doesn't want to do this.

My body wants to be fat.

This is a caveman type response I am sure. If you have more fat on your bones you are more likely to do well in times of little or no food. This is why I belive I am starving and craving everything. Literally I could eat non-stop and not be satisfied.

I tried to satisfy my cravings and ate some mexican food and some pizza. I think this did it because this morning it was egg whites and oatmeal and I seemed to be Ok.

I have lost my weight before. My wife and I would eat a perfect diet all week and one night a week we would eat whatever we wanted. Something strange usually happened after the free night. We would start dropping weight again. It was like our bodies were in starvation mode and when we stuffed ourselves our bodies said " Ok there is not a shortage of food" and we would drop a few pounds the next week.

If that is not the case that is what I am calling it. That is a good reason to break my diet a little I guess.

Here are the 28 day pictures. Sorry it took so long.
Before / After

Friday, February 1, 2008

It's been 28 days so far.

I have been doing this in ernest for 28 days. In the 28 days I have seen the following results.

I have lost a pants size, from 40 - 38
I have lost a shirt size. From XXL to XL.
My blood pressure has come way down.
My resting pulse is a consistant 64 beats a minute.
I feel like a different person. I absolutesly feel great compared to what I did a month ago.

I have lost 12.4 pounds in the last month. That might not sound like a bid deal to a lot of you. You have to remember that I have also put on muscle at this time. You have to take into account that what I have lost is fat alone.

This equates to .44 pounds of fat a day. This is consistant with my results from the first two week where I lost .45 pounds a day.

This makes me happy.

I will post pictures in a couple of hours

Meals Yesterday

eggs/oatmeal
1 - 5 gallon bucket of chinese food. ( this was my last day offshore and I was celebrating.)

Exercise yesterday was none. I was travelling home.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

I ate cake tonight.

It's true, I had me some good chocolate cake. I had a very good reason to eat it.

My life is about to change significantly. I am changing positions in the company I work for and after Thursday I will not be a regular offshore employee.

This means that the life that I have known for the past 11 years will change. It's not like a regular person changing jobs either. If you change jobs, you just move from one to another and your life is essentially the same. I am actually moving out of a place that I have lived for the last 5 and a half years.

My actual lifestyle will change because I am leaving a schedule that gives me 14 days off a month to one that gives me 10 days off a month. The days I will get off are not in a row either.

I am moving into our engineering department. For me this will be a promotion and somewhat of a dream come true. Everyone that knows me knows that I have always had a thirst for knowledge and it is something I am passionate about. I hope I am making the right move and find what I am looking for.

Back to the cake. Our cook, who is a friend of mine, took the time to make a cake in celebration of my promotion. I ate a piece, as someone that hasn't eaten anything like that in about two months I can tell you it was everything I thought it would be.

I also didn't post last night because I tend to get run down at the end of my hitch.

Meals today
eggs/oatmeal
2 cups of chicken soup
1 beef patty
1 cup of corn
1/2 a chicken breast
1 cup of asparagus

Exercise today was tabata cycles

Meals yesterday
eggs/oatmeal
3 apples
2 crab salads
1 cup of corn

Exercise yesterday
week four of the 16 week abs workout.

Monday, January 28, 2008

Work smart not hard

That pretty much sums it up.

I have worked in the past to try to get where I am going. I put out more effort and didn't see the same results in the same amount of time.

I started to wonder where I went wrong. I almost have to believe that it had something to do with being hungry all the time. Now I don't really get hungry at all. I ususlly eat something before that happens. What I usually eat is a piece of fruit between meals and that keeps my hunger at bay. I also thinks it serves another purpose of keeping my metabolism up.

I have to say that I am seeing really, really good results following the program that I am doing.
I will not post them yet until I can verify them on my own scale. I plan on putting up the results along with a picture on Friday.

Stay tuned.

Meals today
eggs/oatmeal
3 apples
1 crabmeat salad
1 fried chicken thigh
1 cup of green beans
cup of corn

No exercise today because it is Sunday and it's one of my days off.

Saturday, January 26, 2008

WWW.REDNECKABS.COM

For those of you who are currently unaware http://www.redneckabs.com/ is my new website address. It is a little easier to get to and the other address was kind of confusing.

I recently put in a request for my last physical exam in the army and other military records. I figure if I am going to benchmark my stats against something it ought to be when I was in my best shape. So I am going to try to duplicate or exceed my physical stats and last PT test from when I was in the Army. Remember I got out 16 years ago.

This is for all of those people that think they can't get their own six pack. I decided to take a picture of what is located just down the hall from my office. Remember all of these things are free and I can eat all I want.

I also haven't touched any of this stuff the whole time. I didn't even show you the ice cream freezer. Yes we have a freezer dedicated to ice cream and I am trying to get a six pack.

If you are wondering, yes, I do hear that stuff calling me all the time. (Insert Captain Kirk voice here) I just have to resist. Our most capable cook also made a huge pan of homemade brownies. It's killing me.








Meals today
eggs/oatmeal
3 apples
1 crabmeat salad
1 chicken breast
1 can of asparagus

My appetite is back in full force!

Exercise today was a 3 mile run on the treadmill at 6 miles an hour with a 5% incline and 2 pound weights in each hand. I wanted to mix it up a little bit.

Friday, January 25, 2008

It's seafood night offshore.

I don't just mean where I work either. A little known fact about offshore work is the meal schedule is the same no matter where you work or what company you work for on Saturday, Tuesday and Friday.

You see Friday is seafood night offshore everywhere in the gulf of mexico. I don't know who set this up but it was sheer genius. This is like party night if you will for all of the offshore folks. Except for us you can replace the word party with either work or sleep because if you are offshore you are going to be doing one of those things instead of partying.

Well it's seafood night for everyone offshore except for me. You see, I developed a shellfish allergy last year. If that is not a cruel twist of fate I don't know what is. Let's think about this. I LIVE IN THE SEAFOOD CAPITOL OF THE WORLD. I really love seafood too. So I have a choice, either enjoy seafood or live. It's a tough one sometimes but I am going to go with living for now. I do know how I might like to check out though.

For those of you that don't have Attention Deficit Disorder and managed to read this far, I have made my website easier to get to. My new web address is:
WWW.REDNECKABS.COM You can just type that into your browser and it will bring you here.

I will re post this tomorrow, for the ADD challenged, higher up on the page. By the way I have been thinking, if you are a grammar Nazi you might want to just move right along because this has got to be killing you. I know I am bad at writing give me a break. I might not be able to write a book but I can fix your TV set.

Meals today
eggs/oatmeal
1 small bowl of Gumbo( I am only human)
2 apples
1 crab meat salad
1.5 grilled chicken breast
1 small crab salad.

Exercise tonight
Third week of the abs workout.
Tabata Cycles.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

What I have learned so far.

My eating habits have changed significantly. I eat until I am satisfied and it is about 1/3 of what I normally eat.

Last hitch I ate pretty much the same way I did this hitch and had pretty much the same result with one exception. About 10 days into my hitch the cook put out some Ravioli.( Our cook puts out soup at 9am everyday) Now me and Chef Boyardee have a special relationship. I absolutely love his ravioli, I could eat a 5 gallon bucket of the stuff. Now keep in mind, this was the first processed food that I had eaten in about 3 weeks. I ate the ravioli and something strange happened. About 30 minutes later I had this unbelievable craving for more ravioli. That stuff was like crack, I couldn't stop eating it.

I can only come to one conclusion, processed foods are addictive. Almost all processed foods have at least some MSG in them. In a laboratory setting they give rats Mono Sodium Glutamate to make them fat. Rats if left to their own devices will not become obese. Slip them some MSG and they are on their way to looking like me. I don't think this is an accident. If I were in the business to sell food it would really help my bottom line if I could make you eat more and I think that is what's happening.

My wife and I recently went to Europe for a few weeks. I was really shocked at what I saw. In the Netherlands I would guess the obesity rate is .05% or less. While I was there I saw a couple of folks that were fat at best. Everyone was slim and trim. (I realize that most of them bike everywhere they go.) One other thing I noticed was that no one really ate any processed food. All of the food that my wife and I ate was unbelievably fresh and tasty. The dishes that we ate were not low fat by any stroke of the imagination but somehow these people stay slim eating that stuff. I have to believe there is a connection.

I am going to continue to stay away from processed foods if I can help it. Being off of them has made it relatively easy to eat a healthier diet.

Try it some time you will see what I am talking about.


Meals today

eggs/oatmeal
1 chicken thigh/leg
1 cup of green beans
1 cup of fried okra
1 Serving of Pork tenderloin
1.5 cups of mashed potatoes and gravy

I am going to try and eat at least one high calorie meal a week to ensure that my body doesn't go into starvation mode and slow my metabolism down.

I took a night off of exercise. I didn't have the abs workout scheduled and I am choosing this as one of my off days for Tabata.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

My sister thinks I am brave.

She doesn't think I am brave for any good reason. I didn't save a child, no burning buildings or anything. She called me brave because in her words, " you put a picture of your big fat gut on the Internet". She didn't say this to be mean, actually we were both laughing. I didn't realize what she actually meant until today.

I am used to being the butt of the joke. I am good natured about it and It doesn't bother me, everyone knows this. Everywhere I go it is always like this, I am used to it and actually it has been happening all my life. This is why I really didn't have a problem putting my photo on the Internet. Whatever ribbing I get won't be a problem.

I think I might have taken this a little too far. I actually told one person that I work with that I was doing this. Now the person that I told, I think, is one of the funniest people that I know. He just has that sense of humor that I find hilarious. So I tell him to go to the website and he looks at it and utters the strangest complement that I have ever received in my life. I hope this is the only time I ever receive it too.

He utters three words that top everyone that has ever poked fun at me.

"WOW, Nice Rack"

I have to say this threw me into a fit of laughter. I really didn't see it coming.

After all, maybe I am brave.

Meals today

eggs/oatmeal
2 apples
1 crabmeat salad
1 small bowl of beef soup
1 serving of spaghetti
3 hearshy kisses
I felt that I wasn't getting enough Carbohydrates and felt a little funny. Hence the Hershy kisses. I wanted to make sure my blood sugar was up.

Exercise.
Abs workout
Tabata Cycles

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Wow, my head looks like a pumpkin.

That picture you see to the right is actually a close up of me around Christmas time. It's a shame because my head is roughly the size of a small pumpkin and as they say, I have more chins than a Chinese phone book.

The chins are mostly gone now and I am glad to see them go. I'll state this again. I really didn't realize how big I had become. I was discussing this fact with my wife, she told me " I never really saw you as fat". This is further proof that love is completely blind and love apparently robs you of your sense of touch too. I am sure that I could bump into a blind person and they would say "watch where you are going fat ass".

Not much going on today. I did get my first ride in a Eurocopter helicopter, not that exciting really. I had to go check out some stuff on another platform.

I know there are some Pinnacle guys watching this. For me failure is not an option. To illustrate my commitment, tonight was steak night offshore and they served fillet mignon, I ate chicken.

Meals today

Eggs/Oatmeal
1 orange
Beef patty ( I had to eat lunch at another platform- No salads there)
Sour Kraut ( I had to eat lunch at another platform- No salads there)
Asparagus
Grilled Chicken Breast

Exercise was Tabata Cycles

Monday, January 21, 2008

Elephant Scabs, Yum!

That might sound kind of gross. It is a name we gave out here to a favorite Redneck offshore staple that we enjoy a couple of times a week. Now this is truly fine Redneck cuisine. It is some sort of mystery meat that is breaded and deep fried. It looks like, well it looks like a big elephant scab to tell the truth, hence the name. I can't eat elephant scabs anymore because they are not really conducive to the six pack abs I am working towards, but boy they sure are delicious, especially covered in white gravy.

I really can't eat much of anything served offshore. My one saving grace is the crabmeat salad. I usually have these a couple of times a day.

I finally got over my cold that lasted 36 hours. I really bounced back faster than normal. I have to believe it is because of the better nutrition that I am getting.

I spoke to my brother today and told him I really didn't feel like working out. He asked if my manjina was hurting. What a guy. I must say I will not give him the satisfaction of seeing me fail.
Hopefully I will inspire him to look as manly as I do if that is possible.

The workout was rough this evening but that was to be expected. The schedule is actually quite aggressive. Each week is harder than the one before and the expectation is that you will be stronger and be able to complete it. So far I have been. I am getting stronger every day and I love the way it feels.

Meals today

Eggs/Oatmeal
2 apples
3/4 Chicken Breast and 1 cup of green beans
Imitation Crabmeat Salad.

Exercise today was The Third week of the Six pack abs workout

Also, Tabata Cycles

Thinking about the last post.

It made me realize that you can spend a lot of effort all day being fat, or you can expend a lot of energy in a half hour and eat right and have it easy all day.

I feel better than I have in a long, long time. I really do and the sad thing is that it didn't really take a lot to get here. Even though I am sick right now. ( really bad Cold) I still have more energy than I normally did. Hopefully I can bounce back from being sick a little faster this time.

I began wondering lately how all of the actors in hollywood have six packs. I realized that is where their priority lies. That is how they make their living. They HAVE to look like that to work and eat. We could all look like that if we made fitness a priority in our life.

When I was starting out in my career I chose to make learning all that I could about my craft a priority in my life. I really put many hours of effort into it outside of work because I wanted to be the best I could, I knew it would effect my income greatly. It's really no different then actors with a six pack. That was where my priority was.

There is really no reason any person with self discipline should be fat. When you become fat you trade long term gain for temporary comfort. What does that really say about you as a person?
That you don't really have enough control over your life to choose what you look like and what you put in your mouth?

That is kind of what led me to this. I want a better life and I am going to work for it.

Meals today

scrambled eggs and oatmeal
2 apples
2 salads with imitation crab meat.

Exercise:
No exercise today. I am running a low grade fever and feel horrible.

Saturday, January 19, 2008

Being fat is hard work.

It really is. I recall hiking in the appalachians and running across a group of hikers. One of them said his pack was 55 pounds and I commented that it was kind of heavy. He said it was not a big deal because he had just lost 60 pounds and he hardly noticed the extra weight he was carrying.

When you think about it in those terms, I have been carrying around 60 extra pounds for a number of years. If I distributed 60 pounds across your body just thing how hard doing your day to day activities would be. I would be nearly impossible.

To further illustrate this fact, have you ever seen a obese person that didn't have large calf muscles. Their calves develop because of the sheer effort it takes just to walk around. When I was at a lower weight I had no calves at all, now mine are well developed.

Getting up when you are fat is also a challenge. You are essentially lifting a normal persons body weight plus 60 or so pounds.

Thats why we all grunt when we get up. We are power lifting.

Meals today

2 cups of scrambled eggs
1.5 cups of oatmeal.
1 apple
1 crabmeat salad
4" of smoked sausage
3 spears of brocolli with a small amount of cheese
some onions and tomatoes.

The salads were getting old so I switched it up.

No exercise today, have bad allergies and I have been sneezing for 12 hours and feel horrible.

Friday, January 18, 2008

That's what family is for.

A good family is great. They are there for you in the tough times, they are there for you when you are down, and they are there to make fun of you when you screw up.

That is how this is going to turn out if I fail to reach my goal. My brother told me so. He took an oath to ride me to the ends of the earth if I didn't get my six pack abs. He vowed to enlist the help of others to ridicule me if I didn't reach my goal. If that wasn't enough, he even said that his tombstone would be erected as a monument solely for the purpose of my humiliation.

That's dedication for you. I have to give it to him, that's a pretty far stretch to go to make fun of someone. I wouldn't expect anything less.

When I get my six pack abs, I will not have to say anything. He will be sitting there on his butt, in wonder at my abs, munching on some high calorie crow.

Besides, it's ok, I am the smarter brother.

Meals today
1.5 cup of scrambled eggs
1 cup oatmeal
3 apples
2 salads with imitation crabmeat.

Exercise today
2nd week of the 16 week abs workout
Tabata Cycles- This was the Tabata principle on a recumbent bike. ( If you have to look up recumbant you might be a redneck too.)

Thursday, January 17, 2008

This is going to be hard.

Eating a strict diet at home is not really a big deal. It is just a matter of choosing the right food at the right time. Working offshore is all together different.

There is a man out here whose sole purpose is to cook tasty food that rednecks like. I don't know how many rednecks you know but all of the ones that I know like fried food. If the rednecks work offshore it is even worse.

So here I am on a metal island in the middle of the gulf of mexico surrounded by tasty fried food. My dining choices are limited. I am really going to have to count on portion control. This means that each meal that I eat will be roughly the size of a tic tac. I can eat a salad if I choose and that will be a choice I make most of the time if my will power holds out.

I didn't do any exercise today because I woke up at 2am to drive 110 miles to the heliport. I caught a flight out at 6am and when I got here I worked a 12 hour day. Keep in mind I am lucky because I live close. Some of these other guys have it rough.

Meals today

3 egg whites/oatmeal
2 apples
1 salad with imitation crab meat for protein ( imitation crab meat is actually quite good for you)
1/2 chicken breast
1.5 cups of Jambalaya
1/2 cup of corn
1/2 cup of green beans

Coincidentally the first day I got my appetite back was my first day back offshore. Great, just great.

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

So I have been doing this for 12 days.




It's true I have been doing this for a total of 12 days. You have seen what I have eaten. Here are the 12 day results. ( The reason that I am doing this is that I am going offshore tomorrow)



The Picture on the left is the picture I took when I started and the one above was taken last night. There doesn't look like there is a difference but my pants are already looser and my clothes fit different.

I took my blood pressure and pulse rate today and I have the following results.

BP 117/68 ( this is lower than it has ever been, it is usually 135/85)

Resting Pulse 66 Beats per minute. ( my resting pulse has never been this low, including the army.)

Starting weight: 262

Current weight: 256.4

Total weight loss-5.6 pounds

Average weight loss per day .46 pounds.

Meals today

3 egg whites/oatmeal

1 Chicken Thigh

1 bowl of healty beef soup.

Exercise today is the 16 week abs workout.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

It's really not as bad as it looks.

My health that is. Believe it or not I am physically not in bad shape. I wasn't before I started this at least. Now everything I own is sore, but I have to believe that is a good thing.

My wife ran a marathon in October to raise money for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society.
Being a former paratrooper, I know a thing or two about running. I helped her train at first and ran with her on some of her runs. ( think Clydesdale not Thoroughbred ) Soon she surpassed me and started running fast and I kinda got left behind.

That being said it is not a stretch for me to go out and run 6 or 7 miles. I run at about a 10 minute/mile pace. ( how does that make you feel, Fatass can run! ) I am also running the Mardi Gras half marathon in February.

I also lifted weights for many years but one day I just walked into the gym and realized that the fire had just gone out. For some reason the desire to workout just vanished. I actually stopped mid-workout and walked out of the gym. That was the last physical exercise I did for years. I never did figure out what happened.

Now I have the Internet to keep me honest. There have been a few days like today and yesterday that I really didn't want to work out, I did anyway.

Exercise today was Tabata sprints.

Meals today:
3 egg whites/Oatmeal
1 Bowl of healthy beef soup
1 Chinese Buffet ( This isn't really healthy but I was going a bit stir crazy. I have also allowed for a cheat meal every now and then. This is more of a lifestyle than a punishment.)

I will also post pictures tomorrow. I know you have all seen pictures of a fat guy before and I am going to show you another one.

Monday, January 14, 2008

It's all about the Data.

It really is you know. It's not what you know it's what you can prove.

That being said, I dropped the ball. If this was being done right, I would have got a physical along with blood test to have a benchmark to see results from. I didn't do this. On top of this, this is kind of what I do for a living. I work with things that compile historical data to improve future performance.

The reason I didn't do this is because I really hadn't planned to make a big deal out of this. One thing led to another and now I am on the internet and at least a few people are watching. Sorry folks, I screwed up.

The best guess for my starting stats are:
Weight: 262 ( this is correct)
Height: 6'2" ( also correct )
Resting pulse 84 beats a minute ( it has been this way for years )
Blood pressure 125/80 ( this has become better in the past year )

Exercise today:
Week two of the 16 week ab work out
I didn't do Tabata Sprints because my thighs are killing me. I am going to try to do Tabata 5 times a week with no set day off.

Meals today

3 egg whites
1 golden delicious apple.
2 bowls of beef soup.

My appetite has dropped of so bad I am having to force myself to eat. I will try to be more disciplined in this area.

Sunday, January 13, 2008

We're on like a pot of neck bones.

Seems like kind of an unusual statement, and it is.

I am part of the largest online gun enthusiast community on the internet.( I am a redneck remember.) I posted on there what I was going to do and how long it was going to take me. One of the members said that he would give me three weeks and I would give up.

This comment was not made out of spite or ill character. Reality usually disagrees when statements like mine are made. Generally most people don't follow through, it's not uncommon.

On this website there are multiple levels of membership. He and I are both on the membership that is free and the website features are limited.

I put forth a challenge. I basically told him that if I didn't fulfill my goal in 6.5 months that I would purchase him a Team membership to this website we both frequent and if I did attain my goals he would buy me one. After hashing out the finer details he announced to the world that " We're on like a pot of neckbones". Now that might seem funny to you but that is just how people in the south talk. Our language has a little flavor, similar to a good neckbone I guess.

Meals today
Grilled chicken breast with steamed brocolli ( we ate at chilli's)
1 bowl of healty chicken soup
1 bowl of healty beef soup
1 honey crisp apple.

Exercise was the Tabata protocol. ( I am already starting to see some gain from this.)

Saturday, January 12, 2008

I have an appetite problem.

It's not what you think either. I am having a strange physiological response that shouldn't really be happening according to the amount of physical activity that I am doing.

It's like this. My wife and I went hiking part of the Appalachian trail a few years ago. We brought along with us enough food to feed a battalion of young troops. Something funny happened when we started hiking. My appetite dropped off to almost nothing. It really didn't match the amount of energy I was expending. I should have been starving all day long. To put it simply I wasn't hungry at all. After the first day of hiking I ate, 1 packet of instant oatmeal in the morning, a bag of M&M's for lunch. For dinner I had a small packet of mashed potaotos and chicken breast and I was satisfied. From what I understand this isn't uncommon with other hikers as well.

Instead of trying to carry all that food, we set up catered events at every place we camped. It was quite nice.

I figured the response could only be one thing. It seemed logical that it had to be part of some caveman type fight or flight response. This is the only thing that really made sense to me. If you had to bug out of your cave for some reason your body would be doing you a favor if it didn't get really hungry all the time.

So the conditions that set this off must be extreme physical activity. ( hiking the first part of the Appalachian trail was hard) This really doesn't seem to match what is going on here. I am only exercising about 12 to 35 minutes a day. To me this means that even though I am only exercising a few minutes a day, my metabolism is elevated all day due to the exercises I am doing. I really hope this is the case. Time will tell.

I am already seeing something interesting that I can only tribute to the Tabata Protocol, more on this Wednesday.

If you want more information about any of the foods that I am eating here my wife was kind enough to post here original recipes here for you.

I didn't do any exercise today. I was taking another day off.

Meals today
3 egg whites/ Oatmeal
2 bowls of healty chicken soup
2 Honey Crisp Apples- These really are the best apples in the world. It's like they grow them in Heaven or something.

Friday, January 11, 2008

So what is a calorie?

We see this little word all the time but do we really know what it means.

Actually a calorie is a unit of energy measurement. The definition is - A unit of energy defined as that amount of energy required to raise the temperature of one gram of water by one degree Celsius ...
Essentially it is a unit of heat. So when you see a burger and it has 400 calories it means that there is enough energy present in the burger to raise the temperature of 400 grams of water 1 degree Celsius.

In the past whenever I got sick and ran a fever for any length of time I always felt "thin" afterwards. There was a very good reason for this.

If I weigh 260 pounds, which I do, and I run a fever of 100.4DegF.
This raises my body temperature by 1 Degree Celsius. This takes a tremendous expenditure of energy. (keep in mind a 260 pound person has about 114,000 grams of water) If you run a fever for any length of time I am pretty sure that it is the equivalent of strenuous exercise the entire time you are running a fever. ( If anyone has the exact calculation for this let me know)

So that brings me around to my main point. When you lose weight where does it go? Quite simply you lose it in the form of heat. Anything you can do to get your body to generate heat will make you burn calories.

Exercise is the most common way to do this. When you run you sweat and you sweat because you are producing heat. It's that simple.

The Tabata protocol makes you produce heat all day. Trust me, when I do the Tabata workout I sweat for two hours after I am done. For the rest of the day my skin feels like I am running a fever. It is pretty remarkable. Time will tell how well this is going to work!

Exercise today:
16 week Abs workout
Tabata Sprints

My meals today:
3 boiled eggs
1 small bowl of french onion soup
1 chicken panini sandwich from Jason's Deli
1 Honey Crisp Apple

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Wow Eitek1 got fat

So this is the response of everyone that I know that is going to see this tomorrow. I am finally sending a link to all of my friends and family. These people probably haven't seen me with my shirt of for some time. They are going to be surprised.

Everyone tells me I carry my weight well. If you are being told this, it is not a complement. People are being polite to you. Trust me, I finally saw pictures of myself. I do not carry my weight well. I carry my weight like every other Fat Ass Redneck carries their weight.

I look huge. The power of the male mind to deceive itself is phenomenal. I really didn't belive I looked as bad as I do.

Well I guess that is why we are all here isn't it. To do something about looking like a fat ass redneck.

I took a day off of exercising because I had nothing scheduled exercise wise and I wanted to lay off of Tabata one day to heal.

My diet today

3 egg whites/oatmeal
3 honey crisp apples
1 big bowl of my wifes healthy chicken soup.

I realize I am going to have to eat a little more, I did seem to eat about every three hours and I never really did get hungry.

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Fuzzy Math

So I decided to let the Uber Geek that resides in me out. I wanted to figure out exactly where I wanted to be as far as body fat goes and what it would take to get there. I just so happened to have a Salter body fat scale. Once I knew where I was body fat wise I could figure out what it would take to get where I wanted to be. I am sure a spread sheet will come into play sooner or later, that's just how I roll.

I sidled up on the scale and it read a ridiculous 30.1 percent body fat. I knew this had to be wrong because an Adonis like me could never have that much body fat. After stepping on the scale many times I was convinced it was correct. To get where I have really good abs I have to be about 7% body fat. That means I have to lose 23% of my total weight. This mignt not seem like a lot but it is 60 pounds. This will leave me weighing 200 pounds. I haven't weighed 200 pounds in 15 years, or since I got out of the Army.

I have to burn roughly 181,000 calories. To quantify this 181,000 calories is equal to 903 Krispy Kreme donuts or 373 big mac's or 621 Kentucky fried drumsticks (extra crispy).
If I burn 2.5 pounds of fat a week in 29 weeks I will be at my goal. I am going to do my level best to get there.

Again, this is a journey. I am not going to kill myself to get there but I am going to get there. I will do this sensibly. I have a tendancy to go all out and become unreasonable, I am not going to do that this time. I am focusing on eating healthy 80-90% of the time. I think this will get me real close to my goal. The closer I get to 200 pounds the more strict I am going to have to be.

Also, Tabata might have something right. There is something going on.

Meals today were.

3 egg whites/oatmeal
2 apples
1 chicken breast with steamed Broccoli
8 ounces of roast beef with 1.5 cups of rice and gravy. MMMMmmmm

I also did the Tabata work out and the 16 week abs work out.

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

I think my wife is tougher than me.

Yes, it's true I think my wife might be tougher than me. I am not even mentioning the marathon she ran in September. I am talking about the TABATA PROTOCOL work out.

A little background is in order. The Tabata protocol workout consist of maximum effort for 20 seconds and rest for 10. This is supposed to boost your metabolism for 24 hours.

So I ask my wife to time me for my work-out. She promplty says that she wants to do it as well. Now I have visions of how this is going to go for us. I imagine that she is going to have to go way down the road so I can hear her tell me to stop. I am actually worried that I am going to run out or ear-shot in my 20 second sprint.
That's not really what happened. In the first 20 seconds of my sprint I ran the length of my driveway. In my defense I have a country driveway that is about 110 yards long. In the second twenty second sprint I didn't quite make it to the end of my driveway this time. After two sprints I needed a longer rest break than 10 seconds.
That is when my wife started her workout. She did just as I did. She ran the length of my driveway but she did it four times in the proper amount of time. I do believe she is tougher than me. On top of this she had just eaten two bowls of soup. After my wife finished her workout I completed mine.
I have to say something about the Tabata Protocol. I think Dr. Tabata is still mad about world war two and has sprung the work-out on Americans as revenge for their loss. This thing is killer.
Two hours after I finished my work out and had showered I was still sweating. No joke. I worked out for a total of 12 minutes and perspired for two and half hours. If I don't see results from this I will be suprised.
My meals for the day were:
3 egg whites
4 bowls of healthy soup
2 oranges
1 bag of fat free popcorn

They say abs are made in the kitchen.







They say abs are made in the kitchen. In that case my abs are made of delicious Papa Murphy's pizza. We went to my dads last night to watch the national championship game, Go Tigers. My wife cooked Papa Murphy's for everyone there. I had 3 pieces and a coke.


My entire caloric intake for yesterday was:
Two Boiled Eggs
One bowl of oatmeal
One apple
One Orange
Three small slices of Pizza.
This is not starting well. I did do my exercise yesterday though. I did my 20 minute work out in our spare bedroom on my wife's wool rug. I am going to have to move my workout spot. I have a tendancy to sweat alot and by the time I have abs the rug is going to smell like a foot.
Today my work out consists of the beginning of the Tabata Protocol. If my guess is correct this will end with a lot of gasping and puking.
For reference, the picture on top is a picture of me and my Dad the day I graduated Airborne school. ( I had a six pack then)
The picture on the bottom of the guy that looks like he ate the guy that just graduated Airborne school and his Dad, is also me.


Nothing worth having is easy.






Monday, January 7, 2008

It has begun

So my day started off with my wife going to the gym and my healty breakfast of oatmeal and poorly cooked eggs. I have to be the only man alive that can't boil an egg.

So what inspired me to do this you ask. I came across a video by accident of a guy advertising a "Spartan 300" work out. For those of you that have seen the movie you can understand why anyone would want to be built like that. I was mildly intrigued. I followed the link to the video and found a website. http://www.iwantsixpackabs.com/abs.html This website lays out a 16 week program to get six pack abs. I can read and I have some will power so I figured I can do this.
The guy on the website wasn't selling anything, he was just promoting fitness. When I was in the army I did most of the exercises that he did, so I figured why not. This was my inspiration.

For a little clarification I am officially starting today but I have been easing into it for about a month and a half. In that month and a half I have been working up to completing the first workout. In that month and a half I have lost almost 20 pounds.

THIS STUFF WORKS.

Sunday, January 6, 2008

So this is how it begins!

I guess this is how it begins. You wake up one morning and you are 36 years old and look in the mirror. The guy looking back at you isn't the one that you remember. That guy is getting old, and he is fat too.

Once upon a time I was a paratrooper. Paratroopers are tough and thin and everything else you might believe goes along with that. Back then I could exercise till you got tired. Back then I had a six pack. Now, as R. Lee Ermey would say, I am a disgusting fat body.

Well no more, I have decided that I will have a six pack. In this year of our Lord 2008 I will have my six pack that has been languishing under so many doughnuts.

That sounds great and all, but if you knew me you would think it the ramblings of a crazy person. The reason you would think it crazy is that I weigh 260 pounds. The last time I saw my six pack I weighed 160 pounds. I basically need to lose an 11 year old before my six pack shows up.

I will do this without walking into a gym, taking weight-loss pills or crystal meth. I will do it focusing on diet and basic exercises. I know it will not be easy but anything worth having is worth working for. So now I am beholden to the world. I basically have to answer to everyone on the internet if I fail.

Wish me luck because I start tomorrow.